Benchwarmers

So much had happened in the last two weeks that even I myself found it hard to believe that THAT was all in less than fourteen days.

Sad to say that not all of them were of good news. Almost all of them were bad news actually. I must be running out of luck these days. So that means better luck is just around the corner right? Hehehehe..*fingers and toes and everything crossable crossed*

Anyways, I was just flipping through last November's copy of teenvogue (the one with Kirsten Dunst on the coverpage) and it kinda reminded me of one line in Elizabethtown; "we are the substitute people". Then the mind started wondering...

Perhaps there is a lot of truth in that line. We are all substitutes of another person in a way, and the other person is a substitute to another person, and so on and so forth. So what are we doing about it? Just watching it happen and let it spiral down into doomness? Maybe we are the voluntarily substituted people of our times. We complain when it gets too much, but then we just go on our duty of being another person's substitute of his/her other more important, but unfortunately-absent-for-the-time-being person.

So the question is that WHY do we allow ourselves to be the substitute people? Out of pure sick fun which we get from being mentally tortured? Or is it that we'd rather be the substitutes than to be nothing at all? Regardless of us being aware of the fact that this whole benchwarming routine is never gonna get us anywhere.

Then the other thing that happened for almost two weeks already is this... *drumroll* ... I've quitted smoking for 11 days already!!! Muahahaha.. Perhaps it's not such a big thing to shout about, but it is an accomplishment for now, especially at this time where every little thing matters more than ever. Was sick like a dog for the whole week and the whole quitting couldn't have came at a worst time. I was coughing my lungs out every single day, but thank God I managed to go through that phase and came out alive, and with no cigarette in hand! Hehehehe..

People think that I'm not aware of all these dangers that I'm exposing myself to, but come on. I'm only human. Of course I know what I'm putting into my body, I'm not an ignorant person, just that I made a stupid choice and that's it. At least I know what I'm doing now, and if you're going to support me to go further to stay clean then thank you. It really means the world to me. But if you're going to preach about how stupid I was and all that, then kindly show yourself to the back door. I've known my mistakes and I'm now moving on, so after this whole rough week, nagging just for the sake of proving to me further of how stupid I was and also to show me your extensive knowledge on the dangers of nicotine is the last thing I need right now.

I guess all these idiocricy only makes us another human on this globe which was once nothing but a spec of dust.