trying

every blog ive visited has been swarmed with pages long worth of resolutions and all that new year stuff and i was pretty tempted to do the same and then thought "maybe its best to leave that personal stuff in handwriting". =/

so heres a very mundane post about the days before the new year. recap people!

so erm.. couple of days before the big 09 i received a couple of messages from people ranging from party invites to just plain hanging out with random people. not really my idea of fun to end the year. work has been well.. work. but im not complaining. its a pretty good way to just step out from my comfort zone and earn some cash. even if it means putting up with a couple of wacked out people who decided to turn eating out into a lets annoy the shit out of these chinese waitresses and smack their faces with our fake engrisssssh accent fest. 

im complaining already arent i? 

so erm yeah.. just layan only lar.

and erm.. so i decided that i really wasnt in the mood to make small talks with random people by hanging out with a couple of friends and lisa's message couldnt  have come at a more perfect time. so it was just gonna be both of us being silly at starbucks with her laptop and just chillaxing there. just so you know, thats her in the previous post. 

i had a great time and who knows that it only cost two drinks to have so much fun. we had strange stares from people around seeing two person laughing in front of the comp with their mouths stuffed with serviettes (note: dont butcher me if i happened to spell that wrongly).

so erm what else eh?

we hung out for bout 3-4hours plus and then she dropped me off a lil past midnight since i was working the next day. and then i guessed i kinda pissed someone off for some reason. perhaps? i dont know.

i dont even know if i should be writing bout this. its kinda bugging me as much as i try to ignore it. 

which brings me to the topic bout those who are reading this. i know what they say bout how if youre gonna do this on the internet that you should be prepared that people are gonna read it somehow and lay their criticisms on it. 

i do realize that this IS a mundane blog. but it doesnt reflect my person as a whole. if im happy i just wanna go out there and enjoy it. which is why only the sappy posts are up. i find writing theraupeutic. not because im depressed ALL the time. i mean some people jot down bout their daily lives. some bout those happy moments. and im just doing the same thing, except bout different occasions. so does that makes me a self-centred person? at first i was so sure that i was being misintepreted. but now im really not so sure anymore. 

i guess to most of the people out there has this perception that a blog is supposed to be something which talks bout the excitement of life. bout how theyre living each day. well my apologies that i dont come across as that. not even close. but that doesnt mean that im not living my life. i just dont jot it down. what started out as a medium to rant out turned into something that is talked about for my lack of optimistic views. see how easy it is to be put out and judged just because you dont conform to their perceptions?

theres no need to remind me again about how boring this blog is. i hear it often enough to make me rethink if i should just shut this down once and for all. i mean seriously, if its upsetting then why carry on? then theres also the whole other thought of just doing what i feel comfortable with. just take everything as it is and not too personally.

i guess i just have to try harder at not trying to please everyone. i'll only end up losing more than i can afford. 

not a very optimistic and constructing post isnt it?

oh well...